Tag Archives: Retro horror

Horror’s Greatest Year? Top 10 Horror Movies of 1986!

Once upon a time, I had said that 1981 might have been the greatest year for horror movies, ever. Little did I know I would be having to pick and choose from the banner year of 1986 and fulfill my horror blogger duties by selecting only ten horror films of this year- which honestly is a task I don’t wish on anybody. How the fuck can I decide between Troll and Critters, or Terror Vision or From Beyond without having to subtract one entirely.

This is some horseshit. But, this is the online job I signed up for. Which at the end of the day, all came down to my own personal favorites. Don’t kill me in the comments later.

Anyways, the slasher era was well established by 1986 while birthing its way into mainstream pop culture, and horror films really began to venture into pushing more boundaries in the realm of body horror. Films like The Fly, From Beyond, and Night of the Creeps really go balls deep into graphic transformation and destruction of the human vessel. Hell, even Poltergiest II threw in some body horror apart from its supernatural element.

If you actually look at all the films that the genre released this year, you might get easily overwhelmed with all the titles; with every one of them being GREAT in its own respect. Beyond said visceral horror, franchise sequels, and beloved, good time 80s horror cheese ruled the year. That being said, here are some honorable mentions that deserve all the recognition, but didn’t quite make my top ten personally:

Alright, now that I’m recovering from all my anxiety of having to dissect and put these beautiful classics in a top ten list, here’s the final result.

10. CRITTERS

At the end of the day, I couldn’t ignore the fact that Critters is a goddamn good time. What’s not to love about this fuckin’ film? The cheesy B-horror answer to Gremlins is full of alien puppetry, homages (Dee Wallace and a Crite biting off the head of an E.T. doll), and a great cast to pull it all off. If you’re a horror movie snob, Critters isn’t for you. But, if you’re the kind of guy/gal who has seen Slumber Party Massacre 3 an honorable seventeen times, then you’re already a fan too and respect that Crite Life. But in case you haven’t, pick up the whole collection from Shout! here at Amazon.

9. FROM BEYOND

The loose adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft’s 1920 story of the same title originally published in The Fantasy Fan in 1934, is a visual nightmare of biological horror and not nearly spoken enough about in my opinion. Hot off Re-Animator, Stuart Gordon is back at it here with Jeffrey Combs and Barabra Crampton once more in probably one of the top-ten grossest movies I’ve ever seen in the genre. Some scenes are cringe in terms of adult themes, but the underlying tone along with really cool monster effects stand above the rapey shit.

8. MANHUNTER

The first time we actually got to see Thomas Harris’ Hannibal Lector on-screen was in 1986’s Manhunter starring Will Peterson, Tom Noonan, and Brian Cox as the cannibal doctor. Five years later Anthony Hopkins would blow the top off the cinematic world with his portrayal in Silence of the Lambs and played that character for over a decade in future sequels/prequels- including Red Dragon, which of course is a re-telling of Manhunter. However, Hopkins aside I much prefer this version of the story between Will Graham and his relationship with Lector. While Brian Cox’s Lector stands in the shadow of Hopkins’, the dialogue and tension between Graham and the psychologist are not as “Hollywood” and more natural- which makes it way more terrifying on-screen. And let’s not forget Tom Noonan as Francis Dolarhyde- who absolutely fucking nails it as a goddamn creep.

7. MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE

Stephen King has no qualms about killing kids in his books/movies and with his directorial overview of Maximum Overdrive, he makes that clear as fucking daylight. I can appreciate the balls he has here.

Before Skynet became self-aware, every moving machine in the world went batshit homicidal crazy thanks to a passer-by comet in King’s on-screen adaptation of his 1973 short story, “Trucks”. This movie is just fun as fuck to me. Emilio Estevez VS the Green Goblin toy truck? Sign me up over and over again.

6. LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS

I literally can’t get enough of Audrey II and their hellbent destruction of the human race. The remake of the 60s’ on-screen adaptation of the musical by far exceeds its predecessor and is a damn delight to watch every time. National treasure Rick Moranis along with Bill Murray and Steve Martin almost seems like a bonus and not the main selling point when you look at the movie as a whole. I’m not a musical type of gal, but I’ll sing the shit out of that “Dentist” song.

Also is probably the main reason why I, and many others of my generation have an irrational fear of Dr. Death, I mean, the dentist. Speaking of which, here’s a recap of that song, just because.

5. POLTERGEIST II: THE OTHER SIDE

Sure, The Other Side doesn’t quite have the same magic as the first film in the Poltergeist trilogy, but damn if it didn’t make a bold impact scaring the shit of just about everyone with Julian Beck’s performance alone as the ghostly Reverend Kane. Case in point, that paired with some unforgettable practical effects with monsters created by H.R. Giger, makes this not only a worthy sequel to one of the greatest horror movies of all time but a stand-alone among the greats in 1986.

4. TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2

Unlike Tobe Hooper’s 1974 film, TCM 2 is fucking BONKERS and that is exactly why we love it. I’ll never forget being six years old and walking in on my cousin watching a rented video cassette of this at precisely the scene of the above-animated GIF; I was both horrified and highly intrigued and further traumatized myself as this was my first introduction to Leatherface. Which was great because when I got around the first film later on, its sheer perfection made an even greater impact on my little horror-fueled mind.

TCM 2 has all the right horror elements of a perfect 80s movie. Shock, gore, comedy, and pure entertainment. Unless something better comes along in terms of sequels/prequels, speaking on the heels of the Netflix news of bringing Leatherface to the streaming service with a new film, this sequel will forever be the goddamn best of not only the franchise but a strong contender in the class of 1986.

3. FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 6: JASON LIVES

Jason Lives is a popular installment among fans via the Friday franchise, but I’ll go as far as saying it’s THE BEST along with the (brace yourselves) BEST Jason- CJ GRAHAM. Yeah, I said it.

That being said, Jason Lives embraces every damn thing that is an 80s horror film. There’s cheese, gore, quirky kills, and a masked maniac. What more can you ask for, eh? This is also the first time in a Friday film where Thom Matthews puts on his Jarvis hat and becomes the iconic face for the character- well deserved if you ask me. Also, the first time surprisingly in any film in the series to actually feature children at the camp! Pretty wild that six films into this we are just now seeing these campers and not just the counselors. From the James Bond parody intro to the final showdown at the lake between Jarvis and Jason, this is where Friday the 13th certainly peaked and considering the significant importance of the franchise’s contribution to 80s’ horror, is well-deserving of a top 3 spot here.

2. ALIENS

Aliens is a masterpiece that nearly sets the first film on fire and no one can tell me any different. The film blows the doors open on the original premise giving us a complex yet comprehensible story along with memorable characters we all want to root for. Everything about this sequel is bad-ass, including expanding the hero of Ripley giving us a tried and true female Action Hero. It’s a beautiful thing to witness her journey from the first film well into the second as she transforms from a science nerd astronaut into a one-woman army machine. Also to note, pitting Human Mother against Alien Mother is nothing short of sheer brilliance. But I always can’t help but feel some sort of empathy for Alien mama here. She’s just laying her eggs doing her thing only to have all her homicidal babies blown up by Ripley.

I’d be pretty pissed off too.

1. THE FLY

David Cronenberg’s ultimate visceral horror The Fly stands the test of time as one of the greatest goddamn horror movies, EVER. A love story more tragic than that of Romeo and Juliet, Seth (Jeff Goldblum), and Veronica’s (Geena Davis) tale of love, loss, and destruction is what really makes this movie the ultimate experience apart from all the projectile vomit this film can induce with its extreme transformation scenes.

The Fly is not only a triumph in storytelling but in the visual effects as well. Makeup wizards Chris Walas and Stephen Doo Pwah deservedly won an academy award for their makeup effects on The Fly, but they didn’t forget to thank the actor who brought Brundlefly to life. With the collaboration of these genius and stomach-turning prosthetics along with Goldblum’s brilliant acting chops, this movie gave us the most disgusting character that we’ve ever fallen in love with. The Fly gets all the awards here, and throw in the magic word cheeseburger to boot.

Forgotten Playthings: 30 Years of “Dolly Dearest”

I was nine years old scouring our local Mom and Pop video rental store with a friend after devouring a Personal Pan Pizza from Pizza Hut next door when I first laid my eyeballs on Dolly Dearest. Of course, I was intrigued right away as killer dolls were certainly high on my personal interests list; yeah I was a twisted kid. The late 80s’ and early 90s’ brought terrifying playthings front and center in the horror genre with films like Stuart Gordon’s DOLLS, Puppet Master, and the massively successful Child’s Play. However, this one looked different from the rest. Not only was the antagonistic toy shown as a female, but it featured mainly a female led-cast as well; also to note it has a female director as well- Maria Lease but of course you’re not looking at these things as a kid. Being a young girl, this hit all the right horror notes for me and I immediately rented this sucker to see what this was all about.

Needless to say, my 3-day rental turned into a week-long bender on this Sanzia devil doll because I couldn’t get enough of this fuckin’ movie.

The story goes, a well-to-do picture-perfect family of four moves from Los Angeles down to Mexico where dear ol’ Dad seizes an opportunity with an empty doll factory in an effort to start up a successful business. Young daughter Jessica (Candice Hutson) is undoubtedly upset about this up and sudden move but has a change of heart when she and her father discover a plethora of “beautiful” (I think they’re rather creepy) dolls inside their families’ newly acquired factory that seemed to be never released to the masses. Father Elliot (Sam Bottoms) allows Jessica to take one and that’s when the fun begins as they leave the factory and stroll right on past an underground Mayan tomb of Sanzia, (Satan on Earth) where prior to the family’s arrival, an archeologist accidentally released the malevolent spirit of Sanzia; a devil child spirit that, SPOILER ALERT, possesses these dolls.

Now we got a movie!

As soon as this creepo doll is brought home Jessica begins acting strangely. Drawing weird demonic pictures, lashing out, all-around acting like a typical spoiled brat-zo. Which wouldn’t really raise any red flags except the kid starts speaking devil language to the housekeeper in a threatening manner- who is by the way very religious. Well, being as how Dolly Dearest is possessed by a Devil spirit, this doesn’t go over too well with the girl who is rapidly being manipulated by this doll, and she doesn’t last long in the movie. Mom Marilyn played by Pet Sematary’s Denise Crosby, notices these changes right away, most especially after an Omen-like incident with Jessica in the car sensing the house is being blessed by a priest. Elliot is about as blind as a bat to any of this shit and chalks all these outbursts up to tantrums so he is of NO HELP at all in this situation. Soon, Jessica is totally consumed by the spirit of Dolly and Sanzia and it’s pretty much up to Marilyn, older brother Jimmy (Christopher Peter Demetral), and Sanzia Expert Archeologist Karl Resnick (played by Rip Torn) to put a stop to Dolly and the rest of the possessed porcelain freaks in the factory from taking over children’s souls all over the world.

On top of some cool casting, there are some really great behind-the-scenes people attached to the movie. Dolly took a lot of hints from Child’s Play, including using Ed Gale as Dolly for a few of the more difficult scenes that required human-like movement. The doll itself was sculpted by Brian Wade (The Thing) and brought to life by puppeteer Vance Hartwell (Army of Darkness). The unsettling score was composed by Mark Snow, who is probably most famous for his television work on shows like “The X-Files” and “Smallville.”

Dolly Dearest hasn’t gotten quite the love I feel like it deserves over the years; possibly due to the overload of killer doll flicks of the time and it came too little, too late. Grant it, it’s not the greatest movie in the world, however, I feel it has so much charm and is a nostalgic blanket for me personally that warms me to the bone anytime I watch it. It sure as hell doesn’t deserve the sweeping under the rug treatment. Vinegar Syndrome recently released a blu-ray that has been long-overdue and if it’s been a while, or have never seen it, give Dolly a watch (click here) and bask in the peak of 90s’ killer doll flicks.

Books To Read For Halloween Part II Stephen King Edition

Welcome back, my Nasties! It’s time to dim the lights, cozy up with the corpse of your dreams, and spice the cider as we discuss more terrifying tales to titillate your tinglers this Halloween!

In my previous post, there was a definite lack of Stephen King’s wide variety of grizzly works. Nearly every book he’s written has gone on to become a certain masterpiece in the field of horror and his career has given nightmares to generations since his first published work.

Dedicating time to discuss each of his books would be a miniseries of reviews in of itself, and, admittedly, almost all of his books in their own way can be enjoyed for Halloween, I’ve selected those paranormal powerhouses that I tend to re-read this time of year.

‘Salem’s Lot


This was the book that introduced me to King’s work and I’ve been hooked ever since. Upon a first read – back in my teens – I would have told you the book is primarily about vampires, and, to be fair, it is teeming with legions of undead fiends of the night. The vampires here are ruthless, uncaring, and bestial with blood-lust. King envelops the reader with a phantasmagorical atmosphere much like how the quiet town of ‘Salem’s Lot is slowly engulfed by creeping vampires. It sets a malignant mood for eerie spooks and chills that’s required for Halloween.

Upon re-reading the book last year though I was struck by a new revelation. Something I somehow missed in my youth. This is an exceptional haunted house story. It all has to do with that old corpse of a house looming gravely atop the hill.

Yes, there are the vampires, but the center of the story, the rotted and tacky black core all has to do with that old accursed house where bad things happen and worse things are drawn towards. It’s the demonic heart of the story. In one book King does something very difficult and he does it very, very well. He reinvents gothic horror by utilizing universally established vampire lore set within the shadows of the old haunted (dark) house legend. Bravo, sir. This is a must-read for horror fans.

IT


The book opens upon a dark and rainy day when innocents is taken by the reawakening of an eldritch evil lingering deep in the roots of Derry, Maine. Given the movie’s (both of them now) global success everyone knows who Pennywise the Dancing Clown is. IT’s become a household name now. I picked this one not just because it’s my favorite Stephen King book but because if you like monsters for your Halloween – especially the classic ones – you’ll not want to miss out on reading this book!

Stephen King wrote IT because he wanted a book where he could include all those wonderful Universal guys like Mummy, Wolfman, and Frankenstein’s monster. Plus Rodan just for the Hell of it. Pennywise was his chance to use these monsters he grew up loving. Pennywise takes on the face and image of what people fear, and if children fear monsters they’ve seen in movies that’s precisely what he, IT, will become. This is a macabre terror train monster extravaganza and boasts some truly chilling moments.

You grow to love the main cast of characters and come to fear for their safety. Something that marks the work of a great writer. And King was in his element with this book. The story also allows us to step back in time for a glimpse back to the happier days of childhood. Along the way are monsters, Lovecraftian sized terror, and a Killer Clown. No wonder this is my favorite one!

Needful Things


Often overlooked by its big brothers, this book is an underrated horror gem for fans! For one thing it just screams Autumn to me. Fallen leaves, crisp air, long nights and a haunting presence lurking in unnatural shadows.

As is his favored way of approaching stories, a sleepy little town in Maine finds itself in the center of a hellacious onslaught once a humble emporium opens up. Needful Things, it reads in the window and inside the kindly Mr. Gaunt awaits you with a warm smile and cheerful eyes.

His shop also just happens to have exactly what you’ve wanted your whole life. Can you believe your luck? Your holy grail here in your hometown! The coveted treasure of your heart’s desire. And Gaunt offers you one Hell of a deal. You just have to do him a little favor and it’s all yours. You just have to pull a little prank for him. A trick for your treat.

What starts out as seemingly innocent pranks pulled on local neighbors quickly escalate to harsh offenses. Those deeply buried little irritations that have piled up over the years are like dried corn husks in the mind. Gaunt simply hands every customer a match. He doesn’t make them set the flame. But he does encourage it.

Once again proving how dangerous everyday people are Needful Things establishes the worst kind of monsters are those who wear human faces. And if you want a bit of Devil for Halloween you won’t want to miss out on this one.

Night Shift

Sometimes devoting so much time to a larger book like IT can feel a bit overwhelming. So there’s Night Shift for those of us who want to read a microwave version of King’s horrific imagination. Night Shift is a collection of King’s earlier short stories and includes classics like Children of the Corn, Sometimes They Come Back, and Graveyard Shift among the gruesome tales.

Pet Sematary

Another of his books that just screams Halloween to me. What’s considered to be his very best work by many fans, Pet Sematary is a ghoulish tale of loss, of the sanctity of the grave, and those who would defy the natural course of life. At least on the surface, and that already is a great stuff! But Stephen King always has something wicked underneath it all. And in this case it’s the Wendigo.

Rising out of the dark of night is the demon of starvation, of famine, and of unrelenting desire. The Natives of the land knew of it, became wise to its evil presence once it settled down in those parts, and wisely feared the thing of evil. The ground – the one far beyond the solemn little child-built cemetery – went sour ages ago by the substance of that thing’s evil and the very woods themselves try to keep curious men from ever discovering the accursed grounds dedicated to the Wendigo. It’s a place where things refuse to stay buried.

Who doesn’t love seeing the dead rising from their restless graves? It fits in with Halloween tradition! And this book has plenty of it, but, the book’s primary concern is the evil spirit, Wendigo, who has soured the land and – much like how Pennywise works Derry – pulls the strings to feed its vile needs.

If you’ve only watched the movies you’ve missed half the story. I was hoping with the remake they might feature the Wendigo in a more prominent role but the filmmakers wussed out and left the monster out of the movie. That’s real smart ain’t it? Make a monster movie without the monster. Yes, those buried in the old forsaken Micmac Burial Ground are cursed with unwholesome existence and rise with the stink of the unholy earth on them. But what both films missed is what the power behind the Micmac Burial Ground is.

In the remake we see those creepy kids acting out the ritual to bury their dead pets while they play drums and wear creepy masks. Like some pagan tradition. A tradition revolving around some ancient spirit…like, oh fuck I don’t know, the Wendigo? The movie teased at the presence of the Wendigo and mention it but that’s where it stopped. The evil spirit is active in the book and gives the story a more sinister vibe. Like you know the poor Creed family was doomed the moment they moved into that new house. The Wendigo already stretched out its hand to claim them.

Knowing that the reader can only sit back and read about the doom that befell them.