Tag Archives: Retro Snacks

Seven Kickass Horror Toy Prizes From The Cereal Box

Until my sixth-grade Health class, I always just figured Boo Berry was considered one of the five main food groups.

I fondly remember the days when I would awake before everyone else in my house at the tender age of nine (yeah I’m an early birdie) on a gorgeous Saturday morning to catch the first wave of the ABC Saturday Morning lineup. I would hop out of my TMNT bedsheets, wander down the shagged rug hallway into the kitchen where the breakfast of Saturday morning splendor would commence, consisting of a bowl of my favorite cereal- Apple Jacks… or if we’re talking the Halloween season, duh Monster Cereals.

More often than not, when a glorious unopened box of cereal sat on the shelf with that eye-popping picture on the bottom left corner announcing to the world it held a treasure from the General Mills Gods inside, your morning breakfast turned into a goddamn win for the rest of the day.

Hey, when you’re a kid in the fourth grade, it’s the dumb little things like worthless plastic surprises in your sugary bowl of goodness that make life that much better.

Pulling out your mystery toy from the breakfast treat you valued as much as air felt like a victory of sorts; especially if you had siblings who always tried to beat you to the cereal prizes. Admit it. We all know that one person who dumped the entire box out into a giant bowl in an attempt to fetch the wonder toy, and hell maybe you’re guilty of it. However, in the case when a cereal brand would offer a horror-themed toy inside its four cardboard walls, all bets were off, and you bet your sweet ass I was getting that tiny Halloween treasure before anyone else.

I’m a selfish bastard. I have no regrets.

In honor of these nostalgic moments, let’s take a look back at “lucky seven” times digging towards the bottom of the cereal box for plastic horror valuables paid off big time. From plastic Frankenberry premiums to Monster Mitts, let’s stroll down horror cereal paragon memory lane…

Monster Mitts – HoneyComb

Back in the early ‘70s, Post Honeycomb cereal packaged these fabulous cheap plastic gloves marketed as Monster Mitts. Four different and colorful designs were placed at random inside select boxes consisting of a ghoulish hand unzipping to expose a skeleton, a bloody veiny mitt with the inclusion of a spider, a sea-monster type mitt, and a blue veiny mitt with an all-seeing eyeball. SWEET.

Monster in My Pocket- Kellogg’s Frosties (UK)

The toy line released by Matchbox in 1989 found its way into the UK version of Tonny the Tiger’s Den in the early ‘90s with one of the little buggers hiding inside along the sugary cornflakes as a promo. Later on, in 1995, the UK ran a Wrestlers Monster In My pocket crossover promo with the cereal. I’m an American brat. So I never got to see this cool advert as a kid, so didn’t become hip to this until the internet came along.

Addams Family Flashlights-Addams Family Cereal

1991 was Addams Family madness and were even invading your morning breakfast ritual thanks to Ralston cereals. I don’t remember the cereal being anything great but the flashlights promptly displayed in front of the box rather than inside in the form of members of the Addams clan reeled us in. Lurch, Thing, Cousin ITT, and Uncle Fester mini flashlights were up for grabs in this little diddy, and while the cereal itself didn’t last long, the flashlights themselves are highly sought after by vintage cereal toy fanatics. I still have my Cousin ITT blinker, and it remains a treasured childhood relic.

Spooky Speedsters- Monster Cereal

 The only thing the Church of Boo Berry could make me love it anymore is the inclusion of cereal box prizes once more. The Monster Cereal brand released various spooky treasures inside the marshmallow box of splendor for years, however, the Spooky Speedsters were one of the coolest. Back in 1981, Count Chocula had the coffin-shaped Midnight Creeper, Franken Berry rode the Silly Stretcher, and Sir Boo of Berry cradled the Crazy Cloud Car. Good stuff guys.

Monster Cereal Mascot figurines- Monster Cereal

Moving along with Monster cereal toys, the 8” tall, soft and squeezable vinyl figures are considered the treasure trove of monster cereal collectibles and if you have all four of these beasts, I envy you, kind sir or madam, more than a desperate rabbit who watches in sadness as some selfish kids eat his damn cereal.

Glow in the Dark Universal Monster Heads- Super Sugar Crisp

Before Golden Crisp, Super Sugar Crisp was the domain name for the Post sugary crispy cereal fronted by a sleepy-looking bear mascot; and in the 70s’ Universal Monsters dominated this cereal’s campaign- possibly in competition with General Mills’ Monster Cereals. In 1976, the Universal Monster glow-in-the-dark finger puppet heads that included Frankenstein, The Mummy, The Wolfman, and The Phantom of the Opera were fantastic treasures to find among a box of pediatric diabetes.

Those were cool enough, but I believe these to be the grand-daddy prize of all cereal treasures:

Universal Monsters Glow-in-the-Dark Pull-Out Posters-Super Sugar Crisp

In the same year of super monster madness via Post Super Sugar Crisp 1975, the cereal brand released fuckin’ amazing Universal Monster pull-out posters that were also glow-in-the-dark! These are deemed highly collectible in not only the cereal treasure hunter’s community but the horror genre’s fandom at large. I remember my Uncle had a few of these plastered on his walls when I was a kid, but have since been long gone. I’ve been on the hunt for these for a long time, but have yet to acquire any at a decent price. One day…

Also, it’s sort of hilarious they used the same commercial for the finger puppets as they did for the posters.

Ghostbusters Cereal and Twinkies Coming to a Store Near you!

Oh what a day to be alive when you wake up to find out a long-lost beloved cereal from our childhood is making a comeback in 2021! And a lot sooner than I had even expected!

Breaking the news to the world first, and rightfully so, GhostbustersNews announced that General Mills has taken the once Ralsten brand, which was sold to GM in 1994, and brought the ghost-tastic cereal into the twenty-first century. Presumably a marketing gimmick for the upcoming Ghostbusters film, which I’m totally fine with and am hopeful that Ecto-Cooler may make another appearance this decade as well! The site also revealed that confirmation appeared on the Walmart website– which is expected to go live at a time yet to be determined.

In related Ghostbusters snack news, Hostess is bringing back a new version of the Twinkie. As of course Sir Egon made infamous with using the delightful treat in a now, infamous analogy in the first film. However, in lieu of Key Lime Slime or White Fudge Marshmallow as we’ve seen in marketing campaigns prior, it looks like the center filling will be an electric blue and fruit flavored!

Keep an eye out for these nostalgic ringing treats hitting store shelves soon! And for old times sake, let’s just revisit the Ralston cereal commercial for shits and giggles.

Dear Mr. Peanut, Where Are My Planters Cheez Balls?

It’s as if for years, I’ve wished and prayed to countless Foodie Gods for the return of my favorite childhood snack only to have it dangled in my face and then ripped away like some cruel joke.

Why you do this to me?

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Last month, I spread the joyful gospel from Mr. Peanut himself about the wonderful, and HIGHLY ANTICIPATED return of one of the greatest snacks from our youths- the greasy, and delectable Planters Cheez Ball! Of course, much like with the limited run of the 2016 Ecto Cooler, it wasn’t readily available anywhere and with that Ghostbusters Reboot publicity stunt, it took a massive effort to get my hands on some. However, my efforts were not in vain and I did manage to enjoy that concentrated childhood relic. Now in the matter of the mighty Cheez Ball that many have attempted to duplicate, and never come close, it seems as if I’ve been duped entirely.

As reported from the Planters website on the whereabouts of said Cheez Balls, there were to be available July 1st at select Wal-Mart stores and through Amazon Prime Pantry. Albeit, you had to buy a case of 12 from Amazon if you went that route, but at $24 for a bundle of twelve, it wasn’t a rip-off and seemed like a good investment for a family of four. Bonus, the spawns would have a treat in their school lunch bags for the next few months. Anyways, with a guaranteed delivery date of July 18th, I patiently awaited once again the joys of orange, dusty fingertips only to be greeted with a dreaded message from Amazon that my order would not be fulfilled with no explanation other than it was not available at this time.

And I’m kind of pissed off about that, Mr. Peanut. Also, you’ve managed to enrage an entire consumer base who had the same experience as yours truly here.

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So what exactly happened here? I’ve made several attempts of reaching out to Planters to get some kind of answer, coming up with nothing but silence from the beloved monocle-wearing mascot that promised cheezy goodness and came up, well, kind of short. It may be the company itself didn’t realize the demand of these suckers and just couldn’t supply enough for consumer needs. However, I have a hard time being convinced this is the case. Seeing as how petitions have been flying all over the interwebs for years clamoring for the snack’s return. I also don’t want to believe this was some sort of PR stunt to get everyone excited only to blue-ball most of America with an extremely limited supply. because really, if you’re searching at Wal-Mart, chances are you’re probably not going to find that wonderful endcap unless you’re extremely lucky and happen to live in the ONE area of your state that is carrying them. In which case, consider yourself blessed. Because the rest of us are totally jonesing over here like a crack-fiend unable to get a fix.

While I’ve yet to get an answer from Planters on whether I’ll actually ever see a delivery or any future plans of bringing these suckers back permanently so we can ALL get a taste of childhood once again, I’ve taste-tested a variety of cheese balls in order to find the closest taste to that wonderful Planters brand. The answer guys are HERRS Cheese Balls. Right hand to the Foodie Gods, these little balls of sunshine are about the closest I’ve ever tasted to the Planters ball of glory. So, if you’re hankering for a decent Cheese Ball, Herrs is the way to go.

In the meantime, I still sit and wait for an answer Mr. Peanut. We’re all waiting.