Tag Archives: Halloween

Retro Reviews

Las Vegas Universal Horror Unleashed- Haunted House Review

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Not since the days of MGM’s Scream Park which ran for a few years in the late 90s, has horror hit Vegas on such a massive scale, addressing the desired need for a proper haunt for Las Vegas locals and horror fans alike. The only suitable and worthy of noting haunt for the Vegas Valley, which has been running for the last 30 or so years, is the Mollner (JT Mollner of MY STRANGE DARLING, and THE LONG WALK) family’s FREAKLING BROS. But as with Halloween, the haunt comes and sadly goes, leaving people like me Halloween blue balls for the rest of the year. With UNIVERSAL HORROR UNLEASHED located in Zone 2 of AREA 15, the haunt experience doesn’t see an end on November 1st. And you know what? It’s about time we as a society got a year-round haunt. I’m tired of living like a Halloween gopher only to burrow back into a hole once November arrives.

We arrived as soon as the place opened and were greeted right away with a haunting mist and a lovely vampire and her slave gimp priming you up for what lies ahead in the haunts. With 100,000 square feet of horror play at your fingertips that include scare actors on the ground, AND in the air, this place is BUILT like a horror fan’s personal playground. While it is a Universal property, it is NOT like Halloween Horror Nights at Orlando or Hollywood. For one, it’s air-conditioned, thank fucks, and for me, it was a way more intimate experience. Also, as someone who wears the wrong shoes all the time, I appreciate that it is super walkable.

As for the haunted houses, there are four in total inside Unleashed so let’s dive right into each one- I mean, that’s why you’re here, right?

The Exorcist: Believer

If you loved THE EXORCIST: BELIEVER, then you’re going to thoroughly enjoy the shot for shot storytelling of this haunt. This house in particular was the easiest to navigate through, perhaps because it was better lit than the others, and it jam packed with things to look at. The detail in BELIEVER was absolutely insane, so if there wasn’t a scare actor jumping on my ass every 5 seconds, mind you I’m not bitching about that, I would have lingered in every room just to inspect all the fine attributes that went into making this. My only gripe really is that I would have loved to see the iconic Pazuzu face appear somewhere along the way. Yeah, I know it’s not in this movie in particular, but it would have been a nice touch.

The Scarecrow: The Reaping

This is an original concept built specifically for Las Vegas and this is the one that felt the Halloweeniest of all four haunts. The aesthetics of the outside rival that of the HALLOWEEN 4 opening, albeit a much darker version, with a breeze in your face, lots of hay, and jack o’ lanterns abundant, you can smell Autumn here, and it is damn glorious. Now, because it was pitch black dark inside, the photos I took didn’t take kindly without a flash, (with respect flash cameras were off limits due to obviously that being rude as fuck to the actors and other haunt goers) So, no inside look here, but you can use your imagination. So just picture a really pissed off PumpkinHead-like Scarecrow popping out from every corner of this farmhouse and a corn maze outside. It definitely sets the mood for the upcoming season and was spectacularly done.

UNIVERSAL MONSTERS

Let me just get this out of the way real quick: whoever that scare actor is who plays DRACULA, give that man a raise and keep him happy, Universal. That guy hammed up every second of his performance and I ate that shit up like Halloween candy.

Anyway, I truly love that Universal knows it roots and respects it with the Universal Monsters because without them, they probably wouldn’t be around as those films paved the way for the rest of Universal’s history. The haunt incorporates all the famous monsters we know and love as they each have their own little corner of mischief and mayhem. The set design is gothically delightful and while yes, the jump scares were executed flawlessly, it was a weirdly joyful to just walk around in there. Which most likely I can attribute to being exposed to these films while I was in diapers. Sweet horrific nostalgia. More of this, please!

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE

The review you’re about to read is an account of the tragedy which befell a group of two (not so) youths… the tragedy being I wasn’t allowed to join the Saw family. Kind of bullshit if you ask me.

This was my absolute favorite of the four haunts, as it felt like I was walking through the 1974 film and the lens of Tobe Hooper’s immortal horror classic. Chef’s kiss to the set design and whoever’s idea it was to put the opening text credits along with that infamous graveyard corpse opener at the front of the haunt before even going inside. Genius move.

You walk around and see the VW bus at the gas station, turn a hard right and the Sawyer house is right there, fully built in all its glory for you to walk through and try to outrun Leatherface and the rest of the family. With special appearances by Sally, Franklin, and friends, they nailed this experience right down to the bones and chicken feathers. I didn’t want it to end and just like with Believer, I could have lingered around if they had let me just to soak in all the attention to detail.

In addition to the four glorious haunts, horror-themed drinks and bites at the bars and restaurants, there are plenty of places to hang out while enjoying the atmosphere, watch out for MEGAN by the way, and a live show to boot, starring Jack the Clown and Chance with the STAY OR SLAY show that involves audience participation, which yours truly got picked to be a part of. If you look closely, you’ll spot the awkward pickle of the bunch and see me. It’s definitely entertaining, showcasing some crazy talent, and a must-see between haunted housing.

Because I know how Las Vegas can be, I can only hope this attraction stays around for a while because it sure is a breath of fresh air for us horror junkies. When you plan on coming, make sure to pack extra funds for their gift shop, because holy smokes, it is full of wants and needs for every horror fan! And the apparel is HIGH quality, so be prepared to spend extra for that, which I’m more than happy about because there’s nothing I hate more than souvenir t-shirts that don’t last through one washing.

Grab your tickets here and plan your visit today!

Home Video Releases

(VIDEO)The “Halloween 4” VHS Retailers Promo That Kicked Off The 1989 Summer Of Horror Rentals!

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I’m almost certain that I hold the record on the horror blog Internet for writing the most pieces about HALLOWEEN 4– Dwight Little actually agrees with me– and it’s a crown I wear with pride as the Queen of Vincent Drug. To my surprise, however, I’ve never thrown in this little doozy of a retailer promo, which is another kryptonite of mine featuring THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS in all its glory.

In case you’re unfamiliar, a retailer promo is an early release of a VHS tape sent to video store owners that will ultimately either sway them to stock the shelves with said movie or give it a hard pass. In addition, some of these screeners would be sent to the media for review. Hard to imagine a time when critics would have to actually wait on the postman to deliver physical media as opposed to a screener email that can be obtained in under 60 seconds, eh?

Can we also appreciate this standee that was seen in Mom and Pop video shops? I covet thee so hard.

That being said, I don’t think HALLOWEEN 4 was ever going to be a hard sell to horror movie fans, but that, of course, never stops the PR machine from pimping the sequel for home video release like it was one of its top hookers on Broadway St. Hell, they were so confident in their success on the video rental market, they couldn’t even bother to spell Freddy’s Nightmares right when talking about television promo partnerships.

That’s a big dick move there, Mikey.

The street date for HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS landed on May 18th, 1989, just a few weeks after THEY LIVE and CHILD’S PLAY hit the shelves and five days before PUMPKINHEAD was added to the VHS horror movie rentals of ’89. 1988 was a HUGE year for horror movies-you can check my top 15 here-so therefore the Summer months following were a banger for us at the video rental stores.

I mean, they never had to oversell me. I’m the proud mom of two copies, while three others over the past 30 years have been laid to rest from being played to death.

Anyway, enjoy something that brings me a lot of personal joy and fuzziness. Huge shout-out to Tripsy Trailers for uploading this treasure for the rest of us!

Editorials

45 Years of Launching the Slasher Subgenre For 80s Horror: “Friday the 13th”

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That’s right. His name was Jason, and it’s been 45 years since the massacre at Crystal Lake that led to the birth of a horror icon and, technically, the birth of the 80s slasher.

In the early 1970s, Sean S. Cunningham sat in an editing room with director Wes Craven as the two cut together what would become, one of the most disturbing horror films ever made: THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT. Cunningham’s first film, THE ART OF THE MARRIAGE, had attracted Craven, who wanted to be in the film business, a friendship struck and then went ahead and made basically a soft porn film together entitled, TOGETHER. Which is totally what I would expect from the master of 80s perky boob shots and gore.

After Last House, Craven would go on to direct THE HILLS HAVE EYES, but Cunningham had a different vision.

In 1978, John Carpenter’s HALLOWEEN was released and changed the horror game. Cunningham took notice of the huge success of the premise of a stalker going around killing teenage girls and thus began the creation of FRIDAY THE 13TH. A movie that would spawn 9 sequels, a remake, and a crossover with, ironically, one of his old buddy’s own iconic creations, and become one of the most influential horror movies of all time.

So before we go any further, let’s smack a kiss on little Mikey Myers. Because without him, there would be no Jason.

After coming up with a title that like, Halloween, centered around a mysterious date, FRIDAY THE 13TH, the aspiring horror director pulled a massively ballsy move without even shooting one scene of the movie, by making an advert of his movie idea and somehow getting it placed in the July 4th issue of VARIETY magazine. The idea was to maybe secure the financing necessary to start production. The now-infamous and very first ad appeared for the original film in the franchise, proclaiming Friday The 13th “The Most Terrifying Film Ever Made”. The gamble paid off with Paramount picking up the title and a green light to shoot the film for $1.5 million buckaroos.

The slasher film was still in its infancy back in 1979, and though films like BLACK XMAS (which in my opinion was the FIRST true slasher movie),  THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE and HALLOWEEN set the bar for the subgenre, FRIDAY THE 13TH set the standard for the 80s slasher-and the absolute crazy oversaturation of it during that decade. And I wouldn’t have it any other fucking way.

FRIDAY THE 13TH set a new slasher standard for young bloods getting picked off one by one in an isolated setting where no adults could be found anywhere supervising the often horny and impaired kids. If they were around, they were usually presumed as drunk or crazy.

Crazy Ralph, anyone?

Not to mention the now cliché horror movie tropes that we’ve seen in almost every slasher movie since. Sex equals death. Drugs equal death. An unstoppable madman (or in this case, woman) with the killer POV camera shot that doesn’t directly show the killer, that keeps us guessing who their identity is throughout the movie. And of course, we need the all-important final girl. The more innocent she seemed, the better her chance of survival. Of course, FRIDAY wasn’t the first to establish that trend (that credit goes to HALLOWEEN), but they sure as hell ran with it religiously for an entire decade and inspired the very film they kind of-sort ripped off, (HALLOWEEN), to cash in on the slasher boom of the 80s with a couple of sequels. The formula set the standard for FRIDAY movies going forward, and the rest of the 80s slashers that came after.

Also, it spawned Randy. Randy is all of us. Thanks to the likes of Friday the 13th.

FRIDAY THE 13TH opened nationwide in the US on May 9th, 1980. Nobody expected this little horror movie to do much regarding big Box Office numbers, including Sean Cunningham, but holy shit was everyone surprised when this little film shot at Camp Nobebosco in New Jersey blew up and ending up meaning just shy of 40 million in the US domestically, and almost 60 million worldwide. Not a bad profit for a movie that was shot for half a million.

And then just like that, along with a sequel to HALLOWEEN, a film that never intended to have one, a slew of similar films embracing the same tropes that FRIDAY banked on, absolutely inundated theaters and straight to video stores with movies like SLEEPAWAY CAMP, CHEERLEADER CAMP, and SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE. Not to mention the appeal of associating a murderous madman with a holiday like MY BLOODY VALENTINE, APRIL FOOL’S DAY, and SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT. The trend continued throughout the entire 80s, with the golden era of horror movies busting out 253 slasher flicks. And it’s all thanks to a little mongoloid named Jason and his vengeful mother who started it all.

Let’s raise our machetes to Pamela and her fucked up kid this weekend! FRIDAY THE 13TH is currently streaming on PLUTO for free! Now, I’ll be right back…